If I had a million dollars

Posted on by Mark Myers Leave a comment

This was done for LS09 but never quite finished (and i was never THAT drunk), any amendments welcome (even abusive ones)
EDIT: I should also point out that Ben Poole is jointly responsible for the wording.

If I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you a server – I would buy you a server
And if I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
I’d buy you software for your server – maybe a nice os or anti virus
And if I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, i’d install redhat – a nice reliable OS
But if I only had a few thou. I’d buy you IdeaJam

/ A E D – / / / / / / A E D – E – – – /

If I had a million dollars
I’d build a cool place to work
If I had a million dollars
You could help, it wouldn’t be that hard
If I had a million dollars
Maybe we could have a cage for all the managers in there

You know, we could just go up there and get stuff done — amazing
products, code a tonne.

There would be oodles of coffee, plenty of Jolt,
maybe beer at the desk so no coders revolt.

They’d have pre-poured vodka but no pre-poured beer.
Well, what do you reckon? Can you blame ’em? Uh, yeah!

/ D E A / F#m / D E A / F#m / D E A / F#m D… E… /

If I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you Exchange (no, not really that’s kinda cruel)
But if I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you an expensive flop – (yep, like OS2 or Workplace)
And if I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you Steve Miller’s soul – (yeah, can’t cost that much)
But if I only had a few thou., then I’d buy you IdeaJam

If I had a million dollars
We wouldn’t have to write all that Java
If I had a million dollars
We’d write stuff in .NET ’cause it costs so much more
If I had a million dollars
We wouldn’t have to eat none o’that humble pie

But we would eat humble pie. Of course we would, more and more
’cause IBM Consulting would send in the bill and we’d be so poor

If I had a million dollars – If I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you Sharepoint (no, not really, that’s kinda cruel)
And if I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you some top drawer content – maybe Ed or vowe-dot-net
If I had a million dollars – if I had a million dollars
Well, I’d buy you a nice client – haven’t you always wanted a nice client
But If I only had a few thou., I’d buy you IdeaJam

If I had a million dollars, if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, I’d sell SAP

Back to fencing

Posted on by Mark Myers Leave a comment

After a long and boring absence, i am finally getting back to fencing, i had my first lesson with steve on Wednesday, and 2 things were obvious

1) I missed it HUGELY (Steve rocks hard as a coach, even if your not a fencer, go have a beginners lesson with him steve@battling.com )

2) I am so unfit its embarrassing (really really embarrassing)

I start training in earnest this Saturday (at the london fencing club), stickfight, STICKFIGHT!!

Proof Xpages are sexy

Posted on by Mark Myers Leave a comment

I got these images done for a college of mine for lotusphere, who for the feeble reasons of remaining in gainful employment and being professional will not be using them, I therefore throw them open to public (mis)use

(before you click on the attached links, you agree that you are not offended by mild pornographic imagery and I’m not responsible for anything that you do with them,or any result of their display, and that your not going to complain or get me in trouble or sue me or not employ me on their basis or anything boring and nasty like that)

Eclipse Eclipse everywhere and nere a bit of common sense

Posted on by Mark Myers Leave a comment

Now look you software makers, its all very well saying “built on eclipse”, but i now have 3 completely separate instances of eclipse (Notes 8.5, Myeclipse and Flex3) on my machine and none of them seem to be talking to each other (I’ve even just opened them up all at once to see if there was a glimmer of recognition between them, I KNOW you can check for such thinks during an install because vmware workstation DOES for its debugger, I’m not asking for perfect integration, but come on party people, standard platform is nice, but COMMON standard platform would be better, all you have to do is ask “do you have an existing eclipse workspace you wish to install to”. (mutters and trundles off to see if he can glue them together because most of the players don’t seem to like you just switching to a common workspace, there must be an article to be written in getting these to all work)….end of rant

Can I justify Lotusphere

Posted on by Mark Myers Leave a comment

So, I’m back in the UK after my first lotusphere looking at my credit card bill, lost earnings for the week and twittering about if i will be in trouble at my major client on Monday, what are the ups to counter act these downs?

1) I got access to the Lotus devs/Big boys and got them to listen to my Cognos problem, and they TOOK NOTICE!!
2) I got to work with Bruce Elgort, Gayle Elgort, Matt White (again) and Kitty Elsmore, a top bunch of people, very professional and very very tolerant.
3) I learnt Loads and loads and Loads (and Loads)
3) The amazing boys at Ytria have offered me a copy of their software which includes, the completely indispensable scanEZ (a bit of software that i would sell my left kidney to have)
4) I got to be a part of the IdeaJam phenomenon (and access to the indecently beautiful code).
5) Made a S**t load of contacts all of them with fun people who are smarter than me.
6) I got to go drinking with “Wild Bill” (and lived)
7) I had my photo taken with sponge bob.

Now do all these, offset the cost in this financial climate?…. well Yes quite frankly they do, even if i was a permy and also had to pay for it my self, yes!!, i WILL be going next year

(but i WILL be booking early to keep the cost down, ICK!!).